My real first encounter

What do I say to start a new blog!? This is exciting and terrifying at the same time. I guess I really shouldn't worry. I think I will just start off by sharing my story.

About 3 1/2, almost 4 weeks ago, my best friend decided to have a chat with me. I was in town with a brief amount of time to spare, but I wouldn't have wanted to share that with anyone else. He "kidnapped" myself and our other friend and took us to what he knew to be a "secure" location. Unfortunately for him, he'd only been there during the night, when it was less busy. Nonetheless, it all worked out.
I wasn't sure what we were doing, but he informed us that he needed to talk. All the while, Delilah and I thought he would be speaking of his current "relations" with Delilah. Things had been so confusing between the two of them, and quite honestly, I couldn't understand why Calvin didn't want to date her! Their story, however, should be postponed until a future blog.
We were sitting on a bench, just outside of Salt Lake City, as he choked up and began to cry. I'm not sure if I've seen him cry before. I think I have, but this important event quickly took precedence over any other previous time.
First and foremost, Calvin wanted to know if we would all be friends forever. Duh! Of course we will be. But I guess it is always nice to actually hear it. He had said to us that he, over the last couple of months, had being seeing a counselor at BYU, where he goes to college. I already knew this, although wasn't sure for what reason. He said he was seeing this counselor because he found himself to be attracted to members of the same sex.
I'm not real sure what went through my head at this moment, if anything at all. This wasn't expected. Another blogger, salad, posted her response to a very similar situation that I find to fit perfectly. "After a moment of contemplation I was amazed that I didn't feel shocked, or stunned, or appalled, or any of the feelings that I felt that I should be feeling. Rather I felt my love for him intensify exponentially."
I guess this is where he really started to cry.
Aside from his counselor, and a little "accident" conversation with a gay friend from high school, Delilah and I were the first people he had told of his struggles.
He told us he still has a testimony and that if this trial could leave him, he'd want it to.
The rest of the conversation leaves my mind, but it wasn't a very long one. (I did only have about 40 minutes after all.) However, Delilah and I immediately responded with warm gestures and sentiments. The conversation was awkward because, being on a bench, none of us were looking at each other. This was probably for the best because eye contact at times like these is really hard. I wanted to hug Calvin so badly. However, I didn't want to make the first move. The relationship Delilah and Calvin have is a special one and I felt she should go to him first. (I was sitting in between them, a little awkward for a hug between the two, don'tcha think?) After she hugged him for a while, I quickly jumped in.
I cannot express to you how much my heart was soaring. I was on tour with my choir from BYU-I and had been on a spiritual high from that for a few days already. But this, this new quickly taken step in the friendship I have with Calvin was so much more. The love I have for him just jumped leaps and bounds. I knew right away that I wanted to help and let him know how much I love him.
I had to leave soon after this and knew I'd meet up with them later, after the concert that night. We didn't get a chance to talk much after ward, and even if we did, we had other friends there who hadn't been "informed" quite yet. One step at a time.

For the next three days or so, my mind wouldn't stop racing. Calvin, and guys? It didn't seem to connect. Was that a dream? I honestly couldn't focus on anything. Come Monday, for he told me on a Saturday, I went to the Deseret Bookstore to purchase anything that might be of value. I had heard about the book Quiet Desperation through the medium of an LDS website I visit. They had it in the store and so I bought. With no "looks" from the check out lady. I'm not gonna lie. I cried a lot the next few days.
Through having conversations with Delilah, I decided I needed a priesthood blessing. I wasn't able to do my homework. Honestly, I don't know why this was affecting me so much. Calvin said that anyone would react to it and that it takes time. I found a good friend I trusted and asked him to give me a blessing. It worked! Not that I doubted, but it really was a blessing. I was told Calvin was in God's hands and even though I should be there for him, I needed to concentrate on school. It was much easier after that.

Through the course of these last couple of weeks, Calvin and I have had many conversations. I can honestly say that I am closer to him than anyone else, perhaps even Delilah, maybe. I am trying to help as best as I can. I'm trying to learn. All of this is such a new experience for me. However, I really am grateful that Calvin chose me to tell of his trial. I feel that I've grown a lot already. There is still a long road ahead, but through love, friendship and especially through Jesus Christ, I know that he can acheive what he desperately wants--the acceptance through Jesus Christ into that Celestial Kingdom. Calvin has been my rod through many times of trial and when I needed an example of a righteous priesthood holder. He is my best friend. Being open and honest with each other just magnifies this fact.

Charlie

PS Calvin said my name Charlie might be confusing--so to clear anything up now, I am female.